The Roki Sasaki Burger Challenge

After his introductory press conference, Sasaki expressed a desire to try American hamburgers. Our Michael Elizondo might be able to help with that notion.

After his introductory press conference, Roki Sasaki spoke with SportsNet LA’s Kirsten Watson about the signing, any advice he had received, and what he looked forward to seeing and doing in Los Angeles.

About three minutes into this conversation, Sasaki mentioned that he couldn’t explore Los Angeles during the negotiation process and that he was looking forward to trying American hamburgers and looking for the best. Watson briefly mentioned the venerable fast food chain In-N-Out before asking about Mookie Betts’s comment to Sasaki on Instagram involving milkshakes.

Our social media manager, Lindsay Adams, screenshot the comment and responded with the general sentiment of most fans.

While Sasaki did not elaborate on the milkshakes, regardless of whether they bring anyone to the yard, he leaves us with an obvious question to answer as a civic responsibility to a newcomer to Los Angeles, a question that only we, dear readers, can answer.

Where is the best burger in Los Angeles?

We could alternatively call this question the answer to the Roki Sasaki Burger Challenge. But before we go down that rabbit hole, we must acknowledge that we at True Blue LA did exhaustive, in-depth research about a burger promotion that the Dodgers would not shut up about last season.

“Free” Jumbo Jacks, revisited

For those who have already forgotten, if the Dodgers struck out seven or more batters in a game at participating locations the following day, one could get a free Jumbo Jack from Jack in the Box with the purchase of a large soft drink.

On July 24, Joe Davis opined that there was likely the existence of someone who likely took advantage of this promotion at every opportunity, which would be a bargain for someone’s wallet with self-control and a disaster if one was actually paying attention to what someone was putting into their body on a daily basis.

At the time of publication, the Dodgers had triggered the promotion a gobsmacking total of 79 times in 110 games. It was a fun little bit of research that seemed ripe for the Dodgers’ internet to go nuts about.

Naturally, no one noticed, not even the people’s champion, Stephen Nelson. I wondered if the omission was because I was not yet bonafide, declarations about being the paterfamilias aside.

In case anyone was curious, in the remaining 52 games of the 2024 regular season, the Dodgers managed to trigger the promotion an additional 39 times. All told, the Dodgers generated 118 instances out of 162 (72.8 percent of the time!) that one could go into a participating Jack in the Box and get a “free” Jumbo Jack with the purchase of a large drink.

For anyone who needs reminding, a Jumbo Jack contains 520 calories, 33 grams of fat (42 percent of the recommended daily value), and 700 milligrams of sodium (30 percent of the recommended daily value). That’s 61,880 calories and 83,300 milligrams of sodium, which over six months is eye-popping, but I am still not a nutritionist.

The kicker is that this burger is still middling at best in the grand scheme of fast-food burgers. Even if Sasaki was feeling like a company man, he should probably skip the Jumbo Jack, which brings us back to an actual recommendation of a Los Angeles institution: In-N-Out.

The holy grail of fast food?

One would be hard-pressed to name a fast-food institution more beloved in Southern California than In-N-Out. From the late Anthony Bourdain to noted burger historian George Motz to Gordon Ramsay to me, the fast food chain we invariably swear by is In-N-Out. Honestly, the first place I inevitably return to every time I return from the road to California is In-N-Out. Tony Bourdain breaks down what makes In-N-Out so special.

In-N-Out is famous for its simplistic, high-quality menu with variations in its “not-so-secret” menu. If you want chicken, fish, or nuggets, go somewhere else. One goes to In-N-Out for a burger.

If Young Master Sasaki were to seek my guidance, I would give him my default order, which has never let me down.

Will this order change his or your life? No — it’s a burger. But sometimes, all you need is a burger; the only question is whether you want to eat anything else that day. In-N-Out’s signature burger is the Double-Double, a two-patty cheeseburger that exemplifies the saying: keep it simple, stupid.

Sasaki is young and could probably wolf down Double-Doubles to his heart’s content. I am not young, so my order reflects that sad fact.

• Cheeseburger, animal style (animal Style adds pickles and extra sauce. It also replaces the included raw onion with diced grilled onions, and they fry mustard onto the meat patty) with a whole-grilled onion (an extra onion that is kept intact and reduced down) and extra toast (well-done buns). [Author’s Note: I only get the Double-Double if I have not eaten and do not plan to eat for the rest of the day.]
• Grilled cheese with raw onion (imagine a cheeseburger without the meat), chopped chilies (cascabella peppers), and extra toast.
• Animal fries (fries that are topped with cheese, sauce, and grilled onions)
• Large Diet Coke (if I’m feeling blue, I’ll add a strawberry milkshake)

Here is the raw truth about french fries at In-N-Out. The fries there are generally terrible for their flaccid, undercooked, underseasoned taste and are a far cry from just about any fast food maker in quality. This assessment hurts to write because the company uses quality ingredients. You’ve goofed if you have to turn your fries into a de facto salad to eat them.

The best fast food fries are from McDonald’s, and these potato fireflies only exist at their peak for five minutes once they have been freshly cooked. Otherwise, they are either floppy, flaccid reminders that life’s bloom is all too brief or mummified shards you will find in your car months later.

The trick is to order them without salt every time to ensure peak fries every time.

Is In-N-Out the holy grail of fast food? No—it’s a burger. But sometimes, a properly made cheeseburger with fresh ingredients is enough to put a smile on your face when you’re traveling.

Eater’s Walkabout

“Michael, what if we want to send Sasaki to something better than fast food? Hasn’t someone published a list that does this sort of thing?!?”

Actually, yes. I am a little surprised that Eater LA did not use Sasaki’s comments as an excuse to republish their venerable list of burgers in Los Angeles after the comments went live. It is a good list, but I will admit that I have not visited every location as I do not live in Los Angeles.

Every time I am in Los Angeles, I stop at one location on Eater’s burger list: The Apple Pan. Once again, George Motz, in an 11-minute essay on the history of the venerable L.A. institution and why any Angeleno should go there.

Get a Hickoryburger with cheese, a Coke, and a slice of pie, and you have a meal that will make your day. After the 2024 World Series rally, my first stop after leaving Dodger Stadium was a beeline to — you guessed it — The Apple Pan.

Apple Pan is a combination of history, quality, and nostalgia in providing a burger experience that any Angeleno would and should enjoy. And if Sasaki wanted to have a proper burger with some anonymity in Los Angeles, The Apple Pan is his best bet.

What about the Milkshake, you say?

Before concluding, we cannot forget about Betts’ mildly cryptic comment about milkshakes. Frankly, In-N-Out can do the job as they serve strawberry, vanilla, and chocolate milkshakes. If one wanted to get a combination of two or all three flavors, that idea is not terrible. Personally, I would have a strawberry milkshake at any opportunity, and vanilla milkshakes exist as vehicles for alcohol.

Chocolate milkshakes are fine and sometimes serve to lessen the pain of terrible baseball.

But if you have read this far, I would hope that you would indulge me just a little bit further in recommending a slightly more touristy stop for the Dodgers’ newest right-hander to indulge himself for a milkshake: Bob’s Big Boy in Burbank, CA. For seven years, this restaurant attracted the attention of legendary filmmaker David Lynch, who went for lunch, coffee, and his personal quest for the perfect milkshake.

In true Lynchian fashion, the late master himself describes his quest for the perfect milkshake, which only happened three times in seven years.

If the above interview is not a perfect metaphor for art and, accordingly, life, I cannot fathom what it would be. But for those willing to make the journey, seeking perfection is often its own reward.

Will any of the items covered be a game-changer to The Monster of the Reiwa Era? No, it’s a burger. But sometimes, you get a chance to ask for it in the local tongue, and a burger is just that — a good meal.